An Apology to Loved Ones Who Defied 'No Outrage' Day

Note: In a NYT Op-Ed last week, Bill Maher called for a ‘National Day of No Outrage' on March 25th. Ignoring Maher’s unapologetic plea to personal outrage, this post shines a humorous light on one of the biggest behavioral barriers facing communications. 
Dear Family and Friends,

Dogs are wisely observant, so I’m sure my beloved Weimeraner has noted the battles lost when attempts to divide my attention via his nudging paw have failed. Inciting only minimal cause for pause initially, the situation imploded when you guys hitched a bandwagon ride.     

Remember the Verizon commercial spotlighting the nerdy male who mocked the cellphone competition in “Can you hear me now?” repetition? Well, of equal annoyance for a multi-tasker like me is the question, ‘Are you listening?’   

Since falling for my iPhone 4S, you’ve expressed outrage over diluted communication. Not to dispute Mehrabian’s theory which segments communication into 55% body language, 38% voice tone and only 7% verbal, I suppose the messenger-tilted scale doesn’t absolve the receiver’s accountability. Should I have begged forgiveness for having denied any of you an uncluttered receptacle for messaging? Ok, my bad.          

Even the excuse of a misplaced summons to communications court, brilliant or so I thought, couldn’t crumble your cookies of presumed guilt. Yet, far from the simplicity of dropping mail off at a postal box, increased competition for attention IS disrupting your message’s delivery. Are you happy now with the admission?    

Pardon me if this cuts like a knife, but updating my FB status, joining the Twitter rage of the day and playing on Pinterest held more promise than the blabbering voices in my ear. And even in the off moment when no thumbing a text or uploading vacation pics took place, last night’s Patron-soaked celebrity event or upcoming Saks sale for which I’m ‘App Happy’ added ample distraction from Saturday’s boring banter. Hopefully, that’s all behind us now.

Awash in a new day, I’m convinced my recent medical diagnosis, ADDT, i.e., “Attention Deficit Disorder (due to) Technology, lines a healing pathway. So, with the offering of the truth and nothing but, can you finally see fit to forgive me?

S.